May 29, 2007
Marriage strains and issues
All marriages have difficulties and marriage issues because life has difficulties and issues. The impact those difficulties have depends on the impact that the couple allows them to have. Some couples will fight and claw one another's eyes out, others will ignore the issue and bury it, and still others will seek out professional help with various aspects of their marriage. Regardless of the choice of getting through marriage issues, they will always occur.
All marriages experience marriage issues. Every married couple alive has had at least one conflict during their marriage. The impact that these conflicts have on a marriage is, however, up to the couple. Some couples can have conflict after conflict and experience no problems. Others can experience a breakdown of epic proportions at the first sign of disagreement and collapse under the pressure. Regardless of the reactions to conflict, the reality about marriage is that marriage issues will occur.
All marriages experience problems and marriage issues because life has difficulties and issues. It is a simple fact of life that problems will occur, but the difference between a couple that stays together and a couple that divorces is the manner in which the couple gets through the marriage issues. Some will fight it out, others will ignore it and others will discover a way to constructively get through the problem. Regardless of the decisions made in marriage, marriage issues will occur in some form or another.
Many people fight it out when they have conflicts or marriage issues. For some couples, the best possible option is to yell and scream at the top of their lungs until the problem has been "shouted out". This can be therapeutic if standards and boundaries are set.
If a conflict becomes physical, however, it will quickly turn dangerous for both parties and can serve as a "deal breaker" for the entire relationship. Physical conflict is something that should never occur under any circumstances. Divorce marriage is certainly an aspect to consider if physical conflicts begin to take place. Divorce marriage will quickly remove the participants from the situation and possibly save lives.
In other cases, couples choose to ignore the marriage issues and bury them. This generally unhealthy approach can lead to problems down the road, escalating the original conflict. One thing piles up on top of another and, before the participants are even aware of what is happening, there is an explosion of catastrophic impact.
Relationships often break and buckle under the strains of buried conflicts. The one thing that burying issues can do to a marriage is test the marriage and its strength. This is far from a positive way to discover the strength of a relationship. Marriage counselors everywhere are apt to discourage the burial of issues. Instead, they will encourage structured arguments and discussions.
Many relationships often break under the stress of hidden conflicts. Burying issues, in a marriage, will certainly test the bonds of the relationship in that it will put it under a considerable amount of unnecessary stress. Instead, marriage issues should be discussed in a positive way so as to approach them with an open mind in a productive manner.
For some reason, people seem to want to test the bonds of their relationships by keeping conflicts and issues hidden. Burying concerns in a marriage will certainly test the bonds, but they will inevitably bring about a breaking point as they grow and boil to the surface. Instead, they should be approached as they occur and a discussion should take place.
Other people will seek out marriage counseling help for their marriage issues. This is viewed differently by many couples. Some will view counseling as a last resort, while others will view it as a first call. The idea behind marriage counseling is that a third party will hear the problems of the couple and be able to offer qualified objective advice. Many people put a high value on this type of help, but others find it to be redundant because the counselor does not "know" the couple.
Regardless of the type of conflict resolution used to help with marriage issues, they will rear their ugly head during the course of a marriage. There are many books and other materials that are designed to help couples with conflict resolution skills. Some may turn to therapy, while others ignore the issue. Still others shout the issue out until it is apparently drained from their systems.
Regardless of the method behind finding a resolution to the marriage issues that a couple faces, they serve as a reminder that marriage is a journey that two people take together. Marriage contains its fair share of ups and downs in the form of marriage issues.
Marriage is an adventure and a journey that two people take together, lasting the rest of their lives and challenging their resolve from time to time. Regardless of the method behind finding a resolution to conflicts, they will continue to face ups and downs because of the variety of potential marriage issues that a couple can face.
The reality about issues in marriage is that they will occur, but the true challenge comes in the overcoming of these issues. If a couple is strong and open, the ability to conquer marriage issues will be present. If they hide issues, however, the ability to overcome the marriage issues may be weakened. Over time, marriage issues will begin to represent the various ups and downs that all

